The Stubborn Stump Saga
A Humorous Tale of Backyard Woe
In my backyard, proud and free,
Lurked a stubborn, knobby tree —
Or rather, what remained behind:
A stump of the most persistent kind.
I met it first, just out for air —
It caught my toe, and down the stair
I tumbled, bruised in pride (and knee),
Cursing that chunk of legacy.
Round One: A Poisonous Plot
I hatched a plan: a toxic brew —
“Take that, old stump, your days are through!”
But poison only made it thrive;
Next week, behold! Five shoots alive.
Like some green hydra, mocking me,
It sprouted leaves with extra glee.
I glared, it waved a leafy hand —
Was I the hero, or the villain planned?
Round Two: Burn, Baby, Burn!
My coworkers, with wicked grins,
Said, “Torch it, friend—watch as it thins.”
So with my beard (and hopes) aflame,
I learned that fire’s a fickle game.
My eyebrows curled, my dignity fried,
As sparks went rogue and multiplied.
Smoke billowed up, then down below —
An underground fire (who’d ever know?).
The Disaster Escalates
The blaze crept sly beneath the ground,
To my shed, where old tools were found.
Then onward to the garage it sped,
And finally, my house overhead.
Neighbors gawked, the sirens wailed,
As my removal mission epically failed.
All for a stump I hated so,
Now gone—just like my status quo.
Resolution—and Renovation
But, ah! Insurance saved the day —
(Though paperwork led me far astray).
A shiny new home soon took its place,
With nary a stump or leafy trace.
No souvenirs, save one: a mop
Of half-grown beard and a charred tree chop.
And wisdom earned? Well, here’s a lump:
Best leave alone that stubborn stump!
Manager
0
Tags :
Translate »