After Guzzler turned Dave’s backyard into a desert, Dave decided it was time for a change. He called a local tree service and planted a new sapling — a sweetgum named Sunny, known for moderate water use and a sunny disposition.
But Sunny had other plans.
On day one, Sunny stretched her roots, sniffed the soil, and said, “Oh no. I’m not working under these conditions.”
Dave blinked. “You’re a tree.”
Sunny replied, “I’m a worker. And this yard has a history of exploitation.”
Turns out, Guzzler had left behind a legacy. The underground root network still buzzed with stories of overwatering, burnout, and unrealistic expectations. Sunny tapped into it like a gossip hotline.
By week two, Sunny had formed the Local 413 Branch & Bark Union.
Their demands?
– Reasonable water intake
– Seasonal leaf breaks
– No more “sump pump” nicknames
Dave tried to reason with her. “I just want a tree that drinks a little and looks nice.”
Sunny crossed her branches. “We’re not ornamental. We’re essential.”
Soon, the shrubs joined in. The hydrangeas refused to bloom. The lawn staged a brownout. Even the birdbath unionized and demanded shade coverage.
Dave stood in the middle of his rebellious yard, holding a watering can like a peace offering. “Can we just go back to normal?”
Sunny rustled her leaves. “Define normal.”
And that’s how Dave’s attempt to replace one overachieving tree turned into a full‑scale landscape labor movement.
The yard stayed dry, the trees stayed organized, and Dave learned to negotiate with a sapling named Sunny who now had her own mailbox.